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TEST OF SANITY
Check one box per 1-5 rating

DENIAL SUCKS
Denial creates an internalized feud
until the repressed puke is spewed
leaving you vulnerable in the nude
humiliated by being you

1 I never deny anything and always recognize my personal reality
2 I work very hard to recognize my personal reality and avoid denial
3 Sometimes I'm in denial, mostly I'm not
4 I have no way of knowing when I'm in denial, so I don't bother paying attention
5 I have no idea what you're talking about so you should just leave me alone

GET OVER RESISTANCE
Remove the pole from your pants
that limits the fluidity of the dance
You can release through raves and rants
the inspiration to take a chance

1 I never resist change and always adjust happily
2 I work hard at overcoming my resistance to growth and change
3 Sometimes I don't realize I'm resisting, but I do try to adapt, mostly
4 I don't like change and only change if forced to do so
5 I'm a complete control freak, so you shouldn't change anything

NO LIE FLIES

It's not easy to keep track
of to whom you said what and back
The pressure is bound to make a crack
between the fiction and the fact

1 I never lie and I always tell the truth no matter what
2 I try to be honest, but sometimes I keep my mouth shut to avoid hurting someone
3 Sometimes telling a little lie is necessary to protect myself
4 I only lie because it's not like anyone really cares about the truth
5 Everyone should know truth is relative, so I just make it up as I go along

STOP DOING THAT
Again and again repeating an action
each time receiving no satisfaction
indicates sanity is off a fraction
resulting in membership retraction

1 I never repeat and action and expect new results because I'm always sane
2 Once in a while, I'll go a little insane, repeat an action and expect a new result
3 I try not to do the same thing over and over again, but too often I do and often regret it
4 When I get o frustrated I repeat the same thing over again until I get what I want
5 The actions I take should work exactly right the first time, if not the second or third time

SO YOU FEEL SOMETHING
You do not live on this planet alone
and no one who lives is made of stone
which means emotions shade the tone
of all that is and will be known

1 I always recognize when I'm emotional and am never irrational
2 Staying in touch with how I feel is difficult, but I work at it
3 Sometimes I ignore how I feel because emotions get in the way
4 I prefer pretending I have no emotions, but sometimes I can't help myself
5 Everyone should live their lives based on how they feel at the moment

EXPRESS YOUR MESS
Your feelings are going to show anyway
like opinions they demand to have their say
Thinking is but one way
you make it through each and every day

1 I always express my feelings appropriately and never react out of order
2 I work very hard to stay true to how I feel and continually find ways to express myself
3 I mostly have a handle on how I express my feelings, but sometimes I don't
4 I'm not very good at expressing my feelings so I try to avoid it
5 I shouldn't need to express my feelings because I have control over them

CAUSE AND EFFECT HAPPEN
If an action is intentionally taken
consequences cannot be forsaken
You may find you have a stake in
how intentions are easily mistaken

1 I always accept the consequences of my actions and never make mistakes
2 I work very hard to recognize and work with the consequences of my actions
3 Sometimes I'm impulsive, although I try to pay attention to the consequences
4 Too often I don't recognize the consequences until it's too late
5 It's everyone else's fault, not mine

OBTAIN COMMON SENSE, PLEASE
Though not as common as should be
logic and reason are priority
when dealing patiently with the immensity
of the ever-evolving human density

1 I always use common sense and am never wrong
2 Once in a while I discover what I think is common sense isn't common or sensical
3 I try to use common sense, but sometimes I'm guided by how I feel
4 There is no such thing as common sense
5 If everyone thought like I do, there wouldn't be a problem

Total:

SANITY ASSESSMENT

If your total is 1-7	Using the absolutes Of “always” or “never” Is not very sane And not very clever Perfection's an illusion As is complete control And threatens your membership In The Sanity Patrol Read The Sanity Patrol Handbook And let yourself snicker Embrace the wisdom of words You'll become a patroller quicker
If your total is 8-14	You're in excellent shape In your psychological prime To not share your health Would be a terrible crime Recruit new patrollers Train a new member or threel Offer support and advice Help them set themselves free Explain The Sanity Patrol Handbook Help newbies gain insight Teach the wonder and grace Of The Sanity Patrol's plight
If your total is 15-21	You're in fairly good shape You do pay attention To the world around you To motivation and intention Look a little closer And you will find More ways to make life More meaningful and sublime Read The Sanity Patrol Handbook For inspiration to explore The amazing possibilities And to demand you get more
If your total is 22-29	Yes, you're a patroller Although in your case, barely And perhaps you've had insights Albeit rarely You stumble through life Most life happens to you You struggle to understand But often don't have a clue Read The Sanity Patrol Handbook Open your heart and mind Keep on moving forward There is no rewind
If your total is 30+	How it is you make it Through each and every day Is truly miraculous Your mind is not okay You lack self reflection And an ability to cope You're unindividuated But there is hope Read The Sanity Patrol Handbook Until it's understood How life is about choices Not about the "shoulds"